the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Randomize
