And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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