Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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