just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
