I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
