we have pet lesbian snakes
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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