We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
