peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
