I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Randomize