She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize