Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
