Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Randomize
