Michael Bay diarrhea
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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