so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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