Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
