Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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