Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
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