the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Oh god it's open bar.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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