We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
