Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
