the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
