My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
