ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
