do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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