3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
