yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize