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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
You need a sexual gate keeper
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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