You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Randomize
