isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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