haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
