did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
