I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
