Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(714): View more from California

He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?

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(816): View more from Missouri

is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex

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(573): View more from Missouri

dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(443): View more from Maryland

her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"

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(320): View more from Minnesota

I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that

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(+61): View more from Australia

You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......

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