we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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