Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Randomize