No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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