its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Randomize