what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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