She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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