Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
