Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
