He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
