the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
You should frame my arrest warrant.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Randomize
