There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
