Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
