Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Randomize
