i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
i think i have herpe
just one?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
