gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
do herpes really smell.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Randomize
