Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize