At least make sure they are 18
Why
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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