Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Randomize
