This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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